Privilege of Opportunity

I've been feeling the tug to write about the inspiring perspective shared by one of the adoptive fathers in our orientation class, but I could not find the words of introduction.  As I read our required book this week, "20 Things Adoptive Parents Need to Succeed" by Sherrie Eldridge, her words jumped off the page and filled my thoughts right in.  "The privilege of opportunity"...that's it!

This proud adoptive father of adorable twin girls told the group of prospective parents that as adoptive parents you have a unique "privilege of opportunity" to more clearly see your children as God made them to be, not as who you assume they should become.  Missing a genetic link with our adopted child, more specifically the reality that we can't share every bond and defining moment from the beginning, is something that all adoptive parents and their children will likely grieve.  In the spirit of a quote filled post, Winston Churchill so wisely presents what we can do about it, "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty."  And so it is with adoption.  We can dwell on what we've missed or the hurts along the way, or we can refocus on the uniquely beautiful way God has formed and continues to mold our family. 

This "privilege of opportunity" is an example of that very beauty.  Of course we'll introduce our children to things we like to do and teach them our interests and passions, because that's what you do in a growing relationship, you share your life.  However, as parents guiding our children to become their own individuals, we will be discovering who they are right alongside, perhaps with more open eyes and fascination with the ways they are different from us than we otherwise would have.  We look forward to this life of discovery as we embrace the thrilling mystery and pray we are successful in helping our children navigate their way.

Today we thank God for this "privilege of opportunity" and ask that we maintain this perspective with all our children, no matter how they enter our family.